Dismantle Fears and Insecurities

Ignoring reality won't make reality go away.  We can not just play pretend, ignore all of our problems, and poof... they just disappear. Life does not work this way. I'm pretty sure everyone knows this to be the truth, yet many people still try to do this, including myself. I get it, facing our fears or insecurities head-on can be very intimidating and overwhelming. This is why we need a plan of attack to dominate and conquer our fears, to change our reality rather than run from it.

The first step we need to take if we are going to conquer and dominate our fears is to write them down and establish what fears and insecurities we actually have. Writing these down and making the fears fathomable and tangible helps to make them more real. Addressing the challenge is always the first step, whether it's an addiction we have, a fear we have, or an emotional challenge that we have to face. You must admit that it is real and that you have the power to change!

The second step to conquering our fears and insecurities is getting to the root of the issue. Asking ourselves, the often avoided questions, why do we fear X and why do we have these insecurities? Really owning responsibility for either and knowing it is just a construct of your psyche can help you begin to overcome. Really be honest with yourself and be ready to frame some unpleasant truths. One of the fears I've always had was putting my work into the world. I was fearful of what other people would think or say. Would I not be good enough? When I dove down deep into my mind I realized these fears stemmed from a place of chasing perfection and always wanting to seem smart and be right. Once I identified the root I was able to then move on to the next step.

What are you going to do to change it? Now that you are on step three, this means you have identified your fears/insecurities, you have gone to the deepest of depths in your mind to locate the why. Now you have to decide what you are going to do about it. The move to make now is not to close your eyes and just hope that you change. You must create a plan! A pivotal part of the plan is to accept whatever insecurities you have and embrace them. You have to learn to love yourself no matter what, even if there is a lot you want to change about yourself. Getting mad or upset or embarrassed about any of your fears or insecurities does not help. Now that you have accepted your fears or insecurities you need to decide how you are going to change them. When it comes to fears, facing them head-on is generally the best way to go. Do exactly what you are afraid of doing. Usually after you have conquered your fear once, you realize it’s not that big and bad after all.

 Insecurities are a little bit trickier. Depending on what your reasons are for having your insecurities, you’ll want to attack them differently. If you have learned to accept the things that you are insecure about, then you may not need to do anything more. Solving your why may have helped you overcome that feeling. However, if you came to your why, accepted it, and still want to change whatever it is that you are insecure about, then you need a plan. If you are worried about extra weight you are carrying, then coming up with a nutrition and fitness plan could be a logical next step. If you are insecure about how you sound, then maybe finding someone who can help you with speaking would be your next step. There are endless numbers of possibilities for how to conquer your insecurities, no matter what they are, the key is to choose a healthy option that is right for you.

 The days of ignoring your problems are over! You know now that you have the power of strength to change either your thoughts or your actions. Knowing that everyone has some insecurities and fears can help you realize that they are not meant to stop you from attempting to accomplish what you want. They are just obstacles that you have to get around if you are going to reach your true potential. Write it down, find the why, create a plan, and follow through. Remember, nobody is perfect, nobody is flawless.