Instant Gratification

            Instant gratification is the killer of dreams.  Learning how to be patient is one of the best characteristics one can develop that will lead to being truly strong. It takes an awful lot of will power to be patient. Believe me, I used to be a very impatient kid who wanted things instantly. I wanted to instantly be a pro at the saxophone. When I would ask a question, I wanted it answered immediately. I would get super annoyed if I had to repeat myself. Now, I think patience is one of my strongest attributes that allows me to do what I do today. Patience helps me make people into a better version of themselves both physically and mentally.

            Learning patience is not the easiest task to complete. Achieving this takes little victories. This brings me to my first strategy, enjoy the process. Much like many things in life that do not happen over night, becoming patient is one of them. Learning how to enjoy the process is key to becoming patient. Some things might be out of your control and that’s okay. You may have to wait for someone else to do their part so you can do yours. Your body may shed fat from your legs first and not your back like you would like. Control what you can. Control the work that you do and your actions. But, even be patient with that. People often get hurt trying to go too hard way too soon. Take it easy. Life is not a sprint.

           So many times people try to undo what’s already been done. What’s done is done. LEARN from it and move on. It’s hard to accept when things do not go “your way.” Such as, you didn’t get whatever you wanted whenever you wanted it. This goes back to control. Remember, control what you can and move forward. I repeat, you cannot undo what’s already been done, but you can try to dampen it’s impact. For example, let’s say on the weekend you slipped up and drank and ate a ton of shit. Do not then starve yourself on Monday or workout 10 times harder than normal. Just try to get back on track. Do whatever it is that your plan calls for. 

            Setting goals that you know cannot be achieved overnight is a great place to start. This rids your mindset of instant gratification and it will usually help build habits along the way. For example, instead of having an outcome goal to lose 5 lbs by next week, make your goal something more along the lines of going to the gym 3 days a week for the next 6 weeks. You need to establish the appropriate behaviors first before you can accomplish any outcome goal. In doing this you will be developing a habit, learning patience, and understanding what it takes to accomplish your goals.

            Being patient is true power. It is so easy to blow a fuse over little shit. It’s easy to get pissed off or frustrated because you used to be way stronger or the weight isn’t coming off as fast as you would like. It’s hard to not think about the past but, you’re not going that way.  Look forward and think of how you are going to get to where you want to be. Enjoy the ride. So the next time you find your blood boiling, instead of letting the rage overflow, try to practice some patience. Having piece of mind goes a long way and so does building mental strength. If you want to be considered a disciplined person, patience is most definitely a key factor. So remember, instant gratification is the enemy young Jedi. 

Bringing Thought Into Action

Bringing thought into action. I can't tell you how many times I hear, “I could be as big as him if…” or “I had that idea years ago!” And, if we’re being honest, I’m definitely guilty of the latter of the two. However, none of this matters. Simply thinking about something gets you nowhere. Knowing something does not do you any good if you don't use it. For that reason, learning to put words into action is a major 🔑.

Putting those words into action is not necessarily an easy task. There are often many barriers that stop someone from doing so; they could be scared, they may have a lack of knowledge, or they can’t find the drive. It could also be a combination of the three. All of these are negative forces holding people from their full potential. These forces can be overcome if you have the strength to do so.

If being scared or worried is often the reason that holds you back from doing, this might be the hardest one to fix. Trust me, I know. I will be the first to tell you that being scared is a hard one to conquer. For one, I'm terrified of scary movies. But also, I understand fear being the reason that holds us back from doing. For so many years, I worried about what people thought. I worried how people would view me if I failed. I allowed that fear to stop me from writing, from joining UCONNs football team sooner, and a whole host of other things (such as creating a Roth IRA and so on).  Our fears, however, are usually unjustified. Fears tend to come from having a lack of knowledge about whatever the subject matter is. So, if you are letting being scared stop you from working out because you're worried about how you may look at the beginning, or how far you have to go, try to focus on one step at a time. Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.” Conquer fear and you will truly feel like a champion.

As I mentioned before, fear stems from a lack of knowledge. So, It’s time to get edumacated! Gaining a base of knowledge on whatever it is you want to do will often help bring those thoughts into action. You may want to lose a couple pounds, or maybe gain some lean mass, or eat better. But, you find yourself asking the question, “How should I even begin?” Finding a good fitness professional would be a good place to start when looking for the how. To find a good trainer in your area, you can use the StrongFirst directory @ strongfirst.com/instructors/. The same way you would seek out a dentist for info on teeth, you should seek a trainer to find information about the “how to” for achieving your fitness and health goals. Figuring out how to do something usually makes the process a lot easier. Inevitably, it is up to you to follow through. You still need to execute!

Finding the drive is the final piece that people are often missing. 2Chainz once said, “They ask me what I do and who I do it for.” The drive to start comes from finding out what motivates you. So, who do you do it for? It may be internal or external motivators such as health, money, women, men, aesthetics, etc. Think about it, if you can't bring yourself to want to workout, or finish writing that paper that's due, or whatever it may be, is the drive that you need. Find someone who will hold you accountable, whether it be a trainer, friend, spouse, sibling. Reminders on the phone are also a good choice at the beginning, when the drive may not be there to act on your own. Another tactic that is useful for finding the drive is to plan ahead. Mark on your calendar the date and time that you are going to do whatever thought you have in mind. After you have done this multiple times for weeks on end, it should turn into a habit. That habit will then be the driving force to action.

Once you are able to turn thoughts into action, you are well on your way to having a strong resilient mind. Making the unfamiliar the familiar and creating habits are two paths to success that usually lead to progress and results. Two things we all should want and love. 

Change Change Go Away

          Change change go away, come again some other day. So many people feel that when change approaches the best thing to do is what you have already been doing. Many times when there is a chance to change the opportunity is squandered because we are often too quick to jump to the conclusion that change is bad or that we don't need to change because where we are is super comfortable.

            I can tell you that I was once a person who had few emotions besides anger and happiness. Had never wept a tear while watching a movie and just was kinda an asshole. Fast forward to now, The Great Gatsby made me tear up and I've shaken most of my asshole tendencies depending on who you ask. Point is I changed. I changed a lot and if I hadn't there is no way I would be able to do what I do today, so give change a chance and make something great out of it.

            Let's start off by saying that change isn’t bad. We need to start there. Change = opportunity to grow. Change is beautiful, when a caterpillar turns into a butterfly that shit’s pretty.  The process of living is beautiful and that is filled with change, from being a helpless infant into strong adults. Yet when change appears in our lives as adults we often panic. Don’t panic! I procrastinated moving for months due to my fear of change so I completely understand the feeling. Start looking at the positives that can come from change. Reassure yourself that change is good. It is a great opportunity to learn.

            Take a moment to assess the situation any time change presents itself. Don't fight it. Often times we make these models up in our minds that are absolutely not accurate. How many times have we misjudged a book by its cover? Someone with chronic bitchface turns out to be very pleasant and not a bitch at all. Sometimes we are good at predicting but often times we are not. So the only thing we can do is control what we can control, ourselves. So when change presents itself take a deep look in the mirror and figure out if what you’ve been doing is actually good and has been working for you, and be honest. If it's not, don't be so afraid of change.

           If change presents itself and makes you have to choose between doing what you've been doing and something new, assess first. Has what you've been doing gotten you the results you want. Has it really made you consistent or are these things that you just assumed to be true. In many instances we are running around being insane, doing what we’ve always done but expecting different results. Again, do not be afraid of change. We need to start thinking if someone says to you, “you've changed” as a great compliment. You should be insulted if someone says you haven't changed a bit since high school unless they're talking about you looking young still 😉. Change = growth. If you plant a seed you want it to turn into a plant, fruit, vegetable, something right? That seed goes through change to become whatever it was meant to be. As people we need to do the same thing. The seed won't change without water and nutrients and we won't change without doing anything differently. If you don't want to grow then obviously don't change, sprint from it as fast as you can. But if you do want to grow, embrace change and come out of it a better, stronger person. 

No Shortcuts

I've tried every diet under the sun and not a single one has worked for me. How many times have we all heard that before? Whether it'sa weekly juice cleanse, completely restricting carbs, or not allowing themselves to eat the delicious cookie they've dreamt of nightly, people are continuously looking for shortcuts to take with their nutrition.

Look, I completely understand. I too have struggled with my diet and have sought out some rather extreme solutions to meet my goals, whether those goals were to get as big as The Hulk or as shredded as an action figure. I used to have a closet full of supplements which read “Mass Gainer:Build Lean Mass Fast” or something as simple as “Fat Burner”. This was all while my diet consisted of a boatload of processed and fast food. I didn't have the slightest clue what I was doing with my nutrition, nor did I realize the importance of it. Ignorance and trying to cut corners made me an easy victim for supplement companies to prey on.


However, what I not so quickly found out was that I never achieved the results I sought after, I never got to Hulk status and I never became as chiseled as an action figure (although I thought I was at the time). You see, in order to have long term success you need to make little adjustments that add up to big results over time. It's the decision to slowly start adding the smarter choices of food into your diet and slowly cutting back on the bad choices that over time will lead to success. What people don't realize is that every time you choose to starve yourself to lose those extra pounds before vacation, or go on a liquid diet, you may actually be starving away your muscle. If in fact the pounds you lost were muscle, then your metabolism is now a little worse and trying to lose pounds just became that much harder.

Not a single one of us human beings are made exactly the same, so there isn't a one size fits all “diet”. What works for you might not work for your buddy. Instead, we should all do some research and strive to tweak our nutrition so we don't have to go to these drastic measures to try and get to where we want to be when beach season rolls around. If you can't figure it out on your own or need some help or guidance, then you might want to seek out a precision nutrition coach or nutritionist. Wouldn't it be better to be flex ready year around? I, for one, think so!